Darius Lighthouse’s Acting School Of Legal Acting


>>THE PRESIDENT’S BEEFED-UP
LEGAL TEAM FILLED WITH MADE-FOR-TV LAWYERS PREPARES TO
DEFEND HIM.>>HE WANTED TV-READY LAWYERS —
LLO. ARE YOU AN UNCHARISMATIC LAWYER
WHO WANTS TO BE PART OF AN HISTORIC DEFENSE OF THE
COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF? THEN COME TO DARIUS LIGHTHOUSE’S
ACTING SCHOOL OF LEGAL ACTING! AU CHAUNTE! I’M DARIUS LIGHTHOUSE. I OBJECT! OVERRULED! SUSTAINED! I HAVE TAUGHT TENS OF STUDENTS
WHO’VE GONE ON TO PERFORM AS LAWYERS ON FOX NEWS AND OTHER
SHOWS ON FOX NEWS. YOU WILL LEARN SUCH TV LAW
TECHNIQUES AS THE SOUTHERN SUSPENDERS! ( SOUTHERN ACCENT )
YOUR HONOR, I MAY BE A HUMBLE COUNTRY LAWYER, BUT SINCE IS
WHEN ENTICE AGO FOREIGN GOVERNMENT TO MESS WITH OUR
ELECTION A CATTY WAMPUS BOOGER BOO? I REST MY CASE! AND THE ANGRY TUBAS.>>IS IT YOUR POSITION THAT
PRESIDENT TRUMP SHOULD NOT BE IMPEACHED EVEN IF ALL THE
EVIDENCE AND ARGUMENTS LAID OUT BY THE HOUSE ARE ACCEPTED AS
FACT?>>I’LL ANSWER THE QUESTION. YOU WANT ANSWERS? I THINK ‘EM ENTITLED. YOU WANT ANSWERS? I WANT THE TRUTH! YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH! I REST MY CASE. SO SIGN UP TODAY FOR DARIUS
LIGHTHOUSE’S ACTING SCHOOL OF LEGAL ACTING, AND YOU CAN TRUST
ME BECAUSE I’M NOT ONLY THE THEATER’S DIRECTOR, I’VE ALSO
PLAYED A PIVOTAL CHARACTER ON “LAW AND ORDER.”>>HE WAS KILLED RIGHT HERE. KEYS RIGHT HERE. HIS BRIEFCASE. HE JUST GOT HOME FROM WORK. ( LAUGHTER )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪
>>Announcer: IT’S “THE LATE SHOW” WITH STEPHEN COLBERT!

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