Far Afield: These Bodies


(somber music) – Often, our bodies
become these vessels for harboring so many feelings that we can’t distinguish which ones are
which, or what for. Tingling, masking
our guilt and shame for not keeping them safe, numb when the pain
and the panic set in, restless and tired all at once, with aches and anxiety deep in that hole in
the pit of our stomachs, and the depths of our
chest, and we hate them. These bodies that trigger
and trap us inside. These bodies that feel nothing,
and everything all at once. These cracked shells that
are supposed to protect us, but can’t do their jobs of fighting when
it’s time to fight, of fleeing when
it’s time to flee, and we hold it all
inside and it eats away like an acid bath
that washes over and cleans us out until we
are nothing but a hollow. You can hear the
wind whistle through because we become these vessels for harboring our
feelings that are mirrored and reexperience over,
and over on the flesh and on the skin,
and in the bones because our bodies
become these vessels.

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