Hidden Meaning in Beauty and the Beast – Earthling Cinema


Greetings, and welcome to Earthling Cinema. I am your host, Garyx Wormuloid. This week’s artifact is Beauty and the Beast,
the first animated film to be nominated for Best Picture at the Oscars and Best Interspecies
Kiss at the MTV Movie Awards. It lost both. The film tells the story of a prince who gets
transformed into a buffalo for being jerky, which is a bit of an overreaction since he’s only 11 years old and seems to have no legal guardians Even more unfair is that the curse punishes
the prince’s employees, who did nothing wrong and only want everyone to be their guest. In any event, the spell can only be broken
if someone falls in love with the Beast before a magic flower arbitrarily wilts in ten years. Flash forward 9.99 years later to a nearby
French town where everyone hates a girl named Belle because she likes to read. It’s not right for a woman to read! While Belle is busy getting sexually harassed
by a fuckboy named Gaston, Belle’s father gets sexually harassed by a pack of wolves,
and stumbles upon a castle he’s never seen before even though it’s within walking distance
of the place he’s lived his entire life. The Beast gets mad at Mr. Belle for trespassing
in the castle and makes him his prisoner, effectively allowing him to continue trespassing
forever. Belle offers herself as tribute in her father’s
place, and the beast agrees, forgetting that he has no idea how to talk to girls. Say something to her. His game is so bad that Belle tries to run
away, but those wolves are still hanging around, ready to help drive the plot forward in any
way they can. The Beast saves Belle, which finally kicks
her Stockholm Syndrome into gear. They play dress-up and throw snowballs for
a while, until eventually Belle gets around to remembering that her father exists. She looks in the magic mirror that the Beast
has for some unexplained reason and sees that her father lying down for a nap, having spent
all this time trying to get to the castle that’s like a mile away. Instead of offering to help, the Beast tells
her to go to him. So she does, but when Gaston finds out about
the Beast, he gets super jelly and recruits the townspeople to go search for the castle and kill him. KILL THE BEAST! YEAH! KILL THE BEAST! Seriously, it’s only been ten years since
the spell was cast – why does no one in town know about this enormous castle and the prince
who lived there? What is he prince of if not them? Are they so arrogant as to think they can
exist outside a traditional monarchy? The Beast refuses to fight Gaston, so Gaston takes matters into his own hands by throwing himself into a ravine. (thwomp) Belle announces explicitly that she loves
the Beast. I love you. Thus breaking the spell and turning him back into Tarzan. All the household appliances become human
again, but apparently have no desire to leave the place they’ve been trapped in for a decade. Belle and the nameless prince put on their
signature outfits from earlier and dance like no one above the servant class is watching. Beauty and the Beast can trace its lineage
back to Cupid and Psyche, a second century story by Platonicus in which a beautiful girl
falls in love with mysterious being who will not show his face but it doesn’t matter
because he’s rich. Earth had a vibrant literary tradition of
conventionally attractive women falling for horrible creatures, such as Edward Scissorhands,
King Kong, the Phantom of the Opera, and Kevin James. On the surface, the film appears to argue
that appearance shouldn’t matter because it’s what’s on the inside that counts,
i.e. whether or not your organs work. Belle’s father looks like a kook, so the
dumb townspeople dismiss him as such. Crazy old Morris. He’s always good for a laugh. Gaston is jacked and has a bomb-ass ponytail,
and therefore the dumb townspeople worship him. He’s gorgeous! Belle is the only one who doesn’t judge
a book by its cover, since she’s the only one in town who knows how to read. But the film abandons this message and ultimately
concludes that while it’s great to be beautiful on the inside, it’s even better if you are
beautiful on the outside too. But she’s –
The most beautiful girl in town. I know but –
That makes her the best. The fact that Belle finds true love in a sensitive,
caring 6 ought to be enough for her to live happily ever after, but instead the film rewards
her with a hot slice of 10. Similarly, when the sorceress curses the Beast
during that really explain-y intro, she is trying to teach him a lesson about not discounting a person for being ugly and wearing a weird cloak. However, the Beast never learns this lesson,
because all the film asks of him is to fall in love with the incredibly nice, intelligent,
smoking hot virgin who is gifted to him on his doorstep. Belle is often touted as a strong, empowered
female character, particularly by human standards. While other women in town do their chores
and juggle their babies, Belle has her nose buried in a book. And not just any book — a chapter book! As she explains in her native French, she
yearns for adventure. I want adventure in the great wide somewhere. The film’s opening scene echoes that of
The Sound of Music, in which a nun named Maria Poppins also hopes to expand her horizons
by hearing music for the first time. However, unlike Maria, who crosses the Swiss
Rockies and saves her family from the Alt-Right, Belle settles pretty comfortably into the
typical Disney princess role. She yearns for Prince Charming, even though
he’s happily married to her friend Snow White. Here’s where she meets Prince Charming. She plays the damsel in distress when she
can’t even handle a simple wolf attack. And, in the end, she trades her dreams of
exploring the “great wide somewhere” for a gilded cage. And knowing these guys, that cage probably used to be a butler or something. For Earthling Cinema, I’m Garyx Wormuloid. Au revoir!

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