Jeff Ross and Dave Attell Roast the Audience – Lights Out with David Spade


So, it’s a little different
right now. We’re gonna have Dave and Jeff
do some crowd work for you. This is just a taste
of what you can expect from their Bumping Mics tour,
that I’ve seen. It starts off March 13
at a city near you. And, uh, here we go. You guys
bring some people up with you. -(cheering)
-Okay. One, two, one, two. One, two, one, two. All right. Anybody celebrating
anything tonight? -WOMAN: Birthday.
-Birthday? -Right here.
-Eh, (bleep) you. Could you be less excited
about it? Want to come tell everybody
about your birthday? -Anybody in the second row?
-(man speaks indistinctly) -I hate to say it, Jeff.
-Come on, don’t… What? Jeff, I hate to say it.
I’ve seen more energy -at a gender reveal than here.
-(laughter) -It blasted up. -All right,
this guy wants to come up. Come on up, sir.
Are you guys related? -Ah, this guy’s awesome.
-Come up together. SPADE: Hey, Dave, we’re doing
my gender reveal this Friday. -(cheering, applause)
-One, two, three. Here we go. One, two… three, four. -Clearly, crowd work.
-One more, one more, one more. You look…
this guy looks a little scary. But all right, come on up. All right, we got it. -Oh, boy.
-All right, great. This is awesome.
Can we just start with this guy who’s dressed
for an impeachment hearing? -(laughter)
-I love this guy. Sir, sir, what’s the name
of the pet shop you run? (laughter) This is great.
What’s your name, sir? -Sam.
-Sam? And, uh, what season
were you on To Catch a Predator? (laughter) All right! Third season. What do you… what do you do?
What do you do? -I’m a designer.
-You are? -All right.
-All right. I’m guessing you design
children’s kiddie pools. (laughter) And who’s your…
who’s your buddy here? -Is this, uh, is this your…
-This guy’s awesome. Are you his lawyer?
What is going on here? No. -What’s your name, sir?
-Troy. Troy? And how long have you been
selling coke to David Spade? -(laughter)
-Hey, leave him alone, Jeff. -Cool. -Dave, I’ll let you
handle the women over there. It’s a birthday girl over there. -I understand.
-Say hi. -Miss, what’s your name?
-Taylor. -Taylor, and it’s
a big birthday, huh? -Yes. How does it feel to have
your littlest dream come true -right now?
-(laughter) This is almost like
finding money in laundry. Know what I’m saying? -Who are you here with?
-My boyfriend. Awesome.
Buddy, how’s it going? Not bad. Did you guys meet
on an app or anything like that? No, I wrote a note
and put it on his car. -Oh. Give it up for stalking.
-(laughter) What? -What did you say…
-Oh, look who’s interested. -Go ahead.
-(laughter) What did you say
in the note to him? I said,
“Hi, guy with cool truck. “This is the girl
that parks across from you. “If you’re single and you want
to go out for a drink sometime, -here’s my number.”
-SPADE: I love it. -Wow.
-Wow. Geez. -(applause)
-What do you think of that? Dave, Spade, have you
ever gotten a note on your car -from a woman like that?
-No, I make those and stamp them out
and put them under windshields. (laughter) Too bad
you didn’t meet him first. He could go up on you. (laughter and groaning) She’s tall. She’s tall. -Is on fire tonight.
-She’s tall. -Fire. -This is just a sampling
of what we do. Just a sample. And how about over here?
Let’s talk to these people. Let’s talk to…
Mother, daughter over here? -Come here. How you doing? -Oh,
that’s my favorite type of porn. I love it. Come up here, ladies. Wow! Uh, I-I love how you’re dressed
to paint a bathroom. (laughter) What the heck, Dave? What’s going on here? Did you not know
you were going to be on TV? (laughter) -I did not.
-What’s your name? -Brenda.
-Brenda and…? -Maddie.
-Maddie. -And you’re mother, daughter?
-Yes. And whose idea was it
to come out to the Lights Out show tonight? Uh, my dad, actually. -He got the tickets.
-ATTELL: Really? Where is he? He goes, “They thought they were
going to The Price is Right.” Come up here, sir. Come up here. -Oh!
-SPADE: Yeah, Dad. -(cheering and applause)
-Awesome. -Wow. -Now this makes
a lot more sense. -This makes a lot of sense,
yeah. -Look at… It does? -Mm-hmm.
-How so? Now, you guys were on your way
to SeaWorld and just… -You ran out of time?
-No! No, no, no. -SPADE: SeaWorld.
-No. SeaWorld, no. -Never. Because you don’t…
you don’t support that? -No, never. -ROSS: So, Dad,
what’s going on, Dad? -How you doing?
-Good. I’m doing great. -Doing good?
-Yeah. Yeah. This is turning out
to be quite a little party with the wife and daughter here
and the birthday girl. This is the best orgy ever. You know, it’s very rare to see
a Jimmy Olsen impersonator, but this guy… Sir? Let me ask you this.
Are you single, or no? -No.
-You’re not? -No.
-Really? -Really.
-(laughter) Did someone put a flyer
on your big, old-timey bicycle and say, “Hey”? -No.
-ATTELL: Turn it back around. SPADE:
I saw it. Just a sampling. This is great. Watch out for this guy.
He’s got everyone’s keys. (laughter and applause) Sir, thanks for taking time off
from running a mini storage unit outside Reno, Nevada,
to be here. Well, this is really fun. You guys have all been
very good sports. Dave, any final parting words? Spade, Attell?
What do you think? I like this little sampling.
It was very effective. (laughter) -Dave…
-You heard her. He loved it. -Yeah. -Spade looks like
he’s in a scene from Eyes Wide Shut over there. He’s like,
“Bring me the mother, daughter.” All right,
let’s all take a bow together. -Come on. -Let’s do it, yeah.
-Yeah, take a bow. Give it up for these guys.

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