Xcuse Me (HD) – Full Movie – Sharman Joshi – Sahil Khan – Superhit Comedy Movie


This is the third hill resort
of Khanna-Khurana chain of hotels And I assure you, in
the coming few months… we will start three more resorts
in the country By doing this in this something you
have added that to this something This is my cousin, Mr. Khurana. He has
lived in America for the last 20 years He has been looking after
a business in hotels there He finds it difficult to find
appropriate words in Hindi He wishes to say that since you have
attended the inauguration function… we are thankful to you
with all our hearts I now wish to do to you that
about our something There’s no lack of that… but this will be the
only one of its kind Health resort! Everything here will be
under one of that Every facility in the world will be
available under one roof Oh yes. And you can do that here,
and that… and of course, that too He means you have can have
programmers here, exercises… and of course, always
have relaxation Congratulations, I’m Pedro.
– I’m Khanna This is my younger brother,
my darling, my pet Sayba I’m that…
– Khurana. Well Khanna, Khurana…?
You bring up a swanky resort… bang opposite our own resort and
you don’t even send us an invite? No, that’s because that happened.
– We forgot in haste! Forgot…? But we haven’t We’ve even brought a gift for you.
– Gift…? Take it What insolence is that…?
– Who are you? A.C.P. Pandey! Take the hotel apart!
Break it down! And tear apart anyone
who comes in your way Only one man runs hotels in
this area. And that is Pedro! Where did these guys
spring from…? Every time you stand up to me,
this is how you’ll get beaten up Don’t… don’t wreck things! I told you not to come before me!
That I’d beat you up! Mr. Bulldozer, you must’ve
told my brother, not me Forget a hotel, if someone even
tries to start an eatery here… I’ll bury him alive.
You get that? “Boom boom…
the world’s at our feet” “We’ve got to prove it
to everyone” “On our lips
is a song…” “everyone must listen” “Listen to me, friends…” “to hell with the world” “Every game of life…” “you must win, never lose” “Whatever will be will be…” “don’t worry about the future,
just enjoy yourselves” “What have we to lose,
what have we go gain…?” “we came with nothing,
we will leave without anything” “Boom boom…
the world’s at our feet” “We’ve got to prove it
to everyone” “On our lips
is a song…” “everyone must listen” “What’s life…?
Live it up with style” “Someone tells you
to become a doctor…” “someone asks you
to become an engineer” “Smile, listen to everyone…” “and do what your hearts wants to” “Whatever will be will be…” “don’t worry about the future,
just enjoy yourselves” “What have we to lose,
what have we go gain…?” “we came with nothing,
we will leave without anything” “Boom boom…
the world’s at our feet” “We’ve got to prove it
to everyone” “On our lips
is a song…” “everyone must listen” “Stop feeling shy, friends…” “walk in step with us” “Who’d dare clash with us…?” “we’re the strongest ones.
The rest don’t matter” “Whatever will be will be…” “don’t worry about the future,
just enjoy yourselves” “What have we to lose,
what have we go gain…?” “we came with nothing,
we will leave without anything” “Boom boom…
the world’s at our feet” “We’ve got to prove it
to everyone” “On our lips
is a song…” “everyone must listen” I’ve been the principal in several
colleges over the last many years But this year at this college
has been the best year of my life Look! I’ve lost all my hair My wife has walked out on me See! Am I not happy? But as your friend, I wish to advise
you and especially Chantu and Bantu… that you’ve had enough fun at
the college. Get serious now And bring glory to this college
and your parents’ name What whatever you will…
– In style! We had a nice thing going with
Rani and Sheena… their father was the villain.
– He was a moron He didn’t give sons-in-law like us
our due. He’s going to regret it And what is it with us…?
We’ll find someone else We’re not going to waste our
youthfulness waiting for someone! Yes, my girl wasn’t any
great shakes anyway I took a liking to her because
her father was a millionaire Why did you have to hire
this car at 5000 rupees an hour? Looks like we’re going to
woo a girl and not for an interview You don’t understand. If we go
in an expensive car… maybe they’ll give us a top post.
– Oh yes. And who pays the rent? I’ve made arrangements for that.
Just remember formula 36 Really?
– Yes. Hey 26… switch off
that bloody music! Don’t churn my brains! My
piddly thing has racked it enough Pay attention here, guy This is the map of the bank The one we’re going to rob today Smartass! What did you tell me?
We’re going to kidnap Shyamlal today! We gotta rob a bank today.
That’s it Stop wasting my time
and took a look at this Look… our car will stop here.
Get it? Get into the bank straightaway…
don’t be scared You’ll meet Madan Chikna
in the bank. You get…? He’ll wink his left eye at you,
you wink your right at him… and straightaway get into
the manager’s cabin Hold a gun to the manager’s temple.
Say, “Hands up. Don’t move!” “I’ll finish you…”
Pretend to be angry, what? Hey hero… you see that bank
there? Park the car in front of it Hurry up! Stay here, okay…?
Don’t go away anywhere He chickened! Straighten your tie.
We’ve got to give an interview Looks like the owner
hasn’t arrived yet Appears to be a very poor
man’s office to me Will he give us a salary at all? We’ll shove our hands
in his throat and pull it out. Nobody gets away with our stuff! News in the market is that the boss of
this company is rolling in the stuff But why’s the office
in such a dilapidated condition? He must either be scared of the
underworld or must be a miser at heart Ask him to come here and
give us a good job Hey Uncle… call the old man, will you? Who? Your boss, Mr. Kelkar.
Call him here You’ve brought all the papers?
– Yes, I’ve had enough of this tie You gone off your rocker…?
Don’t sit in the boss’s chair If he comes here,
he’ll kick you out You won’t even be able to sell
incense sticks at this age! I am the boss of this company.
Kelkar Sir… you, sir? I believe in the principles
of Mahatma Gandhi Simple living, high thinking Because of people like you, this
country is saved from ruin, sir! We’ll be proud to work for you, sir.
– To employ the two of you… I’ll be ashamed of myself!
– How can you say such a thing, sir? You won’t find workers like us
even in broad daylight, sir! I need hardworking people.
Marketing takes a lot of hard work It isn’t meant for those who go
around in their father’s Mercedes! Sir, give us a chance…
we’ll work our soles off, sir! I don’t want to take chances
by giving you guys a chance Get up! Gandhiji had such high hopes
of the youth. And you… Long face! Cut the crap now,
okay? We don’t want to work at a
fagged out place like this, okay? Let’s go, Chantu! Loafers! Kelkar has cancelled my contract
because of you guys Did I send you to ask him
for a job or to abuse him? One last time, Lolly… find
us a job, please. One last time Doing that for you has
made holes in my pocket! One last time, Lolly…
we made a mistake. Please! There’s just one way out now Admissions are on in Goa’s
hotel management institute They’ll not only teach you there,
but also pay you a salary Why’re you laughing?
– An astrologer once told his father… that he’d grow up to feed
thousands of people! But what he didn’t say was that
he’d grow up to become a waiter! Because of this behaviour, no one will
employ you to even swab the floor! This is no small hotel.
It’s a big one… a 5-star Don’t tell me! We’ll get to live
and eat in a 5-star hotel? If you land the job, you’ll
even get to sleep there Send us there quickly, Lolly!
– Send you…? Give me 20,000. I’ll send you over.
– What…? You’ll take 20,000 from the
unemployed…? Have you no shame? I’ve been doing that
for the last 3 months! If I’m not shameless now, I’ll have
to stand with a ball my life! In that case, I’ll dump the
20,000 on your table next week! Make it my face rather Your name…?
– Rajaram Rajaram Here you are. Sign here
and pay the money Why’re you collecting 10 rupees
for every money-order form…? We need twenty grand, Bantu!
Think about it! Have patience.
Sweet is the fruit of patience Here comes another customer.
– Now! Please fill up the form for me.
– Right. How much money you’re sending? 27,000 rupees.
– I see Let me have the address.
– Out of my mind! Make the payment.
– Take the money. That’s twenty rupees! The money he was sending,
I’ve directed to my house! In the sender’s column,
I’ve written your father’s name I’m gonna receive the
27,000 at home now! You’re going to rob that man?
– Who’s robbing him? As soon as we got the job
in the 5-star hotel… we’ll return the money with interest.
I have the Jodhpur address anyway You must’ve been born after
a hundred scoundrels died! And a scoundrel’s brother
is a dog and a scoundrel too! It’s so crowded here! I don’t think our turn will ever come.
– Yes, looks like we’ve blown the money Want an admission guys…? I have
a setting with the manager himself I’ll get it for you in a moment.
– He’s trying to con us We don’t talk to
small fries, okay? Our turn’s next.
– What conmen! Crazy guy, don’t look at him That’s fifty thousand. Count it.
– It’s all right Bantu, there is something wrong Everything is wrong.
– What do you mean? Just that the manager of
this hotel is collecting 50,000 from everyone for an admission. 50,000? For a waiter’s job? Oh yes. Corruption is here
to stay in our country It’s not happening. Let’s go.
– Sit down! We’ll use formula 36. The manager
will give us an admission… and also go down on his knees.
Just you see! You’re here for the course?
– Yes, sir Why did you choose this profession?
– Because I hope… to start my own 5-star hotel
someday, sir Really? You mean you will learn
in our institute… and start a hotel to compete with
us? Biting the hand that feeds, eh? No, you’re getting it all wrong, sir.
– So I’m getting it all wrong! You mean, there’s something
wrong with my brains! I didn’t say that, sir.
– Did I say it then…? You think I’m mad? Crazy?
I’ve sprung horns on the head? A man who can’t respect his elders
must leave. Get out! It wasn’t deliberate, sir! I’ll go and take a wash…
– Where the hell are you going…? I wonder where they come from! Sir…
– What is it? You drove him away?
– He’s in the bathroom You must shoot the guys who
refuse to give a bribe, sir Mr. Raj Oberoi from Oberoi Towers…?
– What? Raj Oberoi is the owner of
a chain of 5-star hotels! How has he got a call from him…?
Give that to me! Answer my questions
only in yes or no Yes, okay Does anyone suspect that you are
Raj Oberoi’s nephew? This chap is Raj Oberoi’s nephew! No, no You’ve got to gain an admission here
and serve the whole team for a year We must send the best of the people
from here for our hotel in London And keep an eye on Gill, the
manager of the training institute What for?
– I’m told he’s a very capable man If we could find a man like him,
we can hoist our flag everywhere Even if we have to pay him 10
times more the salary he’s getting We’ll discuss the rest
at dinner tonight, son Was he abusing you?
– He was giving me a job With ten times more
the salary! In London! He’ll be coming any moment. Go and
arrange for some tea and snacks Hurry up!
– Remember my promotion, okay? I take 10 percent It’s okay… I’ve seen your certificates, son.
Sit down… please May I, sir…?
– Please do. Relax Nothing to worry about.
Things keep falling When I first came to this institute
for an admission… I spilt tea on myself! On a place I couldn’t even
apply an ointment! What would you like to drink…?
– Well…? No, sir, thank you That’s all right. Eat something then.
Our fish-fingers are excellent! All I want is an admission
and training at yours, sir But your admission is already done.
– Really sir?! We need capable boys like you No, don’t cry… don’t Sir, actually I have a friend outside
who’s more capable than I am. If he… So bring him along!
Of course! Lovely place! I’ll spend every vacation here!
– And I’m thinking of settling here You must coming visiting me
with your wife and kids sometimes Something like a girl
is drowning in the sea Not like a girl…
it’s a girl who’s drowning Poor girl… she’ll drown
if you don’t go to her rescue Why must I go ? Why not you?
– My mother told me… never try to save
someone who’s drowning You might drown yourself.
– And you’re still sending me? You don’t listen to your
mother’s advise, do you? Have you no human feelings…?
If she drowns… I won’t be able to face anyone!
– Really? Oh yes!
– I’ll go then Hurry What happened?
– My slippers Oh yes. Or you’ll have to pinch
a pair from the temples What happened now?
– My watch. It’ll get ruined Oh yes, bad times anyway What now?
– The clothes Take them off. Strip.
And hurry up. She’ll drown Listen, Chantu…
– What? Your undies will get wet. A girl’s dying… and you’re worried
about my undies! Coming… don’t worry! Not very close Get her hair Pull! So simple Come. Is she okay?
– Yes. Check her. Okay…?
– Are you okay? If it wasn’t for you, I’d have… I’d have died Are you staying in this hotel?
– Yes Your stay and food is
all for free from today How come?
– I’m the owner’s daughter That’s a huge loss!
– Hang on… let me see If we could have a wad instead…? Wad…? I don’t understand Actually, we’re here for
the management training So our food and stay is anyway… I’m here for the training too! We’ll
keep seeing each other for a year! She had you drenched and
left us high and dry, Chantu Oh yes, this was terrible I will teach you everything
that is necessary… for the success of any
5-star hotel Once you have done this course, you
can go to any hotel in the world… use my name and land
the manager’s job Bantu, my son… you’re listening?
– Yes, sir This course is part of the
hospitality industry How does a hospital figure
in the hotel trade? Hospitality means to
tend to the guests Taking care of the guests The five-star hotels are visited
by top bureaucrats… millionaires… how to treat them
is an art in itself Something I will teach you today Chantu, stand up.
Suppose I’m a rich customer… and you’re the waiter.
I visit your hotel… show me how you’re
going to behave with me Bhola, water to table number 9.
Clean the mess at number 4 Collect 12.50 from the guy
in the glasses What do I bring for you, sir?
Roast mutton, lentil-curry… chicken biryani…
what will you have? This is a 5-star hotel,
not a roadside eatery! The customer will run away
at this rate! You sit here.
In the customer’s place Sundri… you show him, dear What will you have?
– How corny could it get! That’s good, dear.
Go back and sit down May I come over, sir…?
– No, son… you’re going to become
a manager straightaway No, you relax Why don’t you show us how one
is supposed to behave, sir? Of course, I’ll show you Know what? You sit here…
and I’ll give you a performance Pay attention, everybody Damn you, baldie!
I don’t know any English! Forget everything else.
Do you have jhunka-bhakar… Kolhapuri ratla and vada pav?
Bloody big mouth! Forget everything, brother You got makki-di-roti
and sarson da saag…? No, we got pasta To hell with the pasta!
We got money. Here you are Here you are Actually, you can also have
customers like him at times That is when you must attend to
them with a smile like mine Class is dismissed He called me a waiter
in an Irani eatery… and we made him an attendant
at a Chinese eatery And he told me, “You’ll become
the manager straightaway!” Wasn’t it fun, manager…?
It’s gonna be a riot! When he gets to know that
forget about a 5-star hotel… your father can’t even start a
tea-stall, what will he go through? Small-fry… eh?
Now see… how this small-fry makes you
dance to his tunes! So he got into my office and
made a proper fool out of me? A sucker is okay, sir.
He made a fool out of you! They made you cut
a sorry picture! You think you’re very smart…
but he rubbed your nose in cowdung! Really? You seem
to be loving it? They still don’t know
what stuff I’m made of You’re a real scoundrel, sir.
They don’t know You got it right, son They’ve taken only
an admission But I’m the one who will give
them marks during the test The tests I put them to…
they’ll go for a toss! Get to work Now they get to face
the music! That you and your team have
found the time… to visit our institute from London,
we are indeed very grateful You have seen the institute Our students will now
present to you various… Dishes Yes, they will present dishes,
you must taste and give them marks Bring the dishes What are you making…?
– An Indian burger Indian burger…? How?
– Simple Buy a few vada-pavs
from the roadside… make a nice design
on the bun… decorate it with a few
onions and tomatoes… The Indian burger is ready! What happened? What happened to her? My lentil-curry is burnt! There’s going to be
a scandal today! I’ll fail… what am I to do?
– Stop crying first, please I feel like crying more! I had worked so hard! Scandal! It’s time for the presentation!
God! What am I going to do? Hang on… I have an idea You present his porridge and
he’ll present your lentil-curry Why’re you messing it up for me?
– You once saved her from drowning You must save her again…
say yes! He has said yes! It’s okay… get going! Come, I’ll give you the porridge Looks like his goose
is getting cooked! For Sundari this Kheer.
And for Chantu this Daal. Khurana, till today, we were too
scared to taste a student’s dish And they’re having a go at it.
– They’re lapping it all up Eat it up Try the porridge our
students have made You’ll be left licking your fingers You laced it, haven’t you?
– Oh yes, sir Half a kilo of salt and
a kilo of laxative Once they’ve eaten the porridge,
give away their rooms to others Why?
– They’re going to remain in the loo The boys will now land
a big egg! Sir, the porridge has arrived!
– Really? How did the name of Mr. Khurana’s
daughter land on the porridge? Yet another ruse they’ve used.
– And it’ll do us in! Excellent porridge! Porridge… this is the
one I spoke about Are you going to do that
to the whole of it…? Are you going to polish off
all the porridge! No, sir… Only I am
eating this May I give your room away, sir?
– Why? You’re going to remain in the loo! Give them the bowl! Why’s he acting like a glutton?
– So he’s not exposed His sidekick had laced your
porridge with salt and laxatives I saw him doing that and decided
to give your dish to Saundarya But why would he do that?
– We’ll get to know tonight How many times…?
– 21 What are you saying? You’ve been to the loo
21 times already Looks like silver jubilee
is coming up At this rate, the golden jubilee
is not very far either You asked me to ruin
their porridge… and look at what
they’ve done to you You’re right.
This is a huge betrayal They first fooled me
and took an admission… they now force the porridge on me
and make a beggar out of me! Pade, do something… please!
– Want me to get red undies? Red undies…? What for?
– Red stops the biggest of trains… what’s this?
– This train’s brakes have failed No train is stopping now! 22 ! At least shut the
door properly, sir Bantu, we’ve been exposed! We’ve escaped this time.
But he won’t spare us next time Before that time arrives,
let’s shut him up permanently How?
– Just wait and watch Mr. Gill ! Save me!
– From whom? From ruin! I had run away from home
with my boyfriend He promised me the moon… but once he had his fun,
he ran away from here He didn’t even settle the hotel bills!
I somehow managed to get out of there But I don’t have money to return
home nor any shelter for the night Mr. Gill, I’ve come to you
with great hopes I’m told you have a heart
as vast as the oceans… And?
– And you let the rivers flow unto you It’s only a matter of
a single night I will make some arrangement
for myself tomorrow No, you needn’t worry at all. I’m the
one who’ll have to do something now You can spend as many nights
in my room as you wish to Say that again, Mr. Gill!
I can’t believe my ears! It’s okay, it’s okay… no girl is shelterless
when she’s with me Let me show you… my room Shall we?
– Oh yes Come… come on in I didn’t ask you your name.
– Nada Dhill Nada Dhill…?
– Nadia Dagar Singh Dhill Your parents knew even when
you were a child…? Lovely name… Nada Dhill.
My name’s Gill I know you’re a decent man.
But your wife’s not around, is she? Where will my wife come from?
I’m not married yet Really? And how about the servants? The servants won’t come here
until I ask them to God, I’m scared! You won’t try to
rape me because I’m alone, will you? Not at all! How can I even
touch you unless you consent? Why not…? If you say it’s
very hot and latch the door… One minute! Switch on the a/c…
it’s switched on anyway Set your bag on the chair
and make me sit on the bed Come on! Looks like the left side
is your favourite! Sit down.
– One minute The telephone here…
move it away quietly take off your coat,
loosen your tie… may I do it for you…?
– Go ahead Now look in my eyes say,
“Will you cooperate with me?” I’d be so scared,
how will I say no? Listen, will you
cooperate with me? There you are! I knew it!
All men are alike! “He makes life miserable…
the wretched Gill” The wretched Gill…
– You sing so well. Come here! Come to me! Sing for me just once! Come… Look, don’t climb over me! Help! Is someone there? I’ve fallen!
– Fallen…? Don’t sleep on me, okay?
– No! Sir… what are you doing? Save me. I’m so happy you’re here!
This old fossil was raping me! Gill, this boy will
beat you to pulp! Chantu… you?
Hello Where did I see you earlier, sir?
And do you stand now? She’s lying!
I’ve only given her shelter! Who’s going to believe you
once she starts screaming, sir? She’ll yell! Help! Help!
– Shut up! Shut up! Why must I shut up just like that?
– Oh, I see! Help! She’s a bitch, sir.
You got some money? Give it to me…
this is no time to count All of it…? Here you are. You’ll keep your
mouth shut now, won’t you? This will only control my tongue.
But my mouth will remain open Big mouth! Give that gold chain!
– Why? She’ll create a scene!
– Help! Take it away!
– The watch… Help me. I’ll save your honour! Here you are. Another sound
from you and I’ll strangle you! Gill, go to hell! What have you done, Chantu?
You gave her all my belongings? How can you say such a thing, sir?
If news of this had leaked… the students would have treated you
like a pariah and spat at you! No! The management would have
kicked you out, I say! Really?
– Oh yes, sir! Yes! Thanks, Chantu. You’ve saved me
from a grave predicament You have no idea how much
I hate blackmailers, sir Now go and take a cold
shower, sir. Please Yes, I’ll take a shower There are robberies everyday!
Watches and purses… mobiles and chains!
And you’re doing nothing! I’m doing my best, sir.
– My foot! At this rate,
we’ll go to the dogs! Working nights really
is exhausting, isn’t it? We get no sleep and
there’s no time to take a bath Gill’s class will begin and he’ll
get an excuse to yell if we’re late Yes. So what are we doing to do? I think this room is vacant.
I’ll go and take a bath… you stand here. Afterwards, you
take a bath and I’ll stand guard I’m coming! What happened…?
Where’s the injury? Here… ? Here…? Maybe on the knee? Where is it then? Here.
– Wow! Clean up this room. I’ll check 354,
there’s a problem with the tap Take a hot bath! Take a hot bath! A jacuzzi is so much more fun! Where is it…? Khanna…
– Yes, Khurana…? As I was saying…
– How’d I know what you were saying? That…
– What? That thing… which is broken…
let’s do it to that Aren’t you ashamed to talk
like that about your wife? Because she has grown old,
you want her to die? Khanna, what are you talking about?
It’s that thing… in which that thing
came the other day That thing which, even before
it started, faced that Are you talking about
the health resort? Don’t even talk about
the health resort Whenever we talk about it,
my health starts worsening But we have so much of that
stuck in it Why don’t we do that to it? Yes, I understand. We have a lot
of money blocked in it Why don’t we sell it?
Of course… but who would want to buy it?
– Look, and you find Him… can’t you find him then? Why don’t we give a that
and see? You mean we can even find God.
So why won’t we find a sucker? You mean, we must issue an
advertisement and see? Go ahead and give it.
Have posters pasted everywhere! In this hotel, you’re…?
– A housekeeping manager I look after the upkeep
of the rooms Who went into the room?
– I, sir Out with the watch. Go on!
– I didn’t take it, sir. I swear I’ll check I apologise on his behalf I swear, sir… Get out! One moment! Without an investigation,
you cannot fire him I’m not a cop to
investigate thieves You aren’t a judge either to
go around punishing people Great dialogue, Chantu! I’m very sure! He’s the one
who committed the theft! That’s a wrong allegation, sir.
Nikhil is being framed How can you be so that
to say he’s not that? You guys are speaking as if
you know who the real thief is! Yes, we know him, sir.
– What? Sit down Who is it?
– There are just two people… in this resort who go
tip-toeing around… like he or he does.
– What do you mean? Either the owner
or the thief! Who is it? Listen… send Monica in here Have you any personal experience
of Monica spying around…? A very bad experience, sir.
A terrible one Really? They say that you are either
a thief or the boss Now tell us the truth. Who are you?
– What…? How did you guys get to know
that I’m his daughter? What? You mean, she’s…? your daughter?
– Trapped! They’re going to kick us
out of the institute! What…?
– Nothing, sir Actually, we had to do that
during the security training I’m glad you have
an eye on me Your daughter Indeed. Mr. Khurana’s only child Actually, there have been
complaints of theft at the resort And Monica had returned from Europe
after four years of training And we knew that no one
recognises her here We took advantage of that and
made her part of the staff So that we’d nab the thief and
she’d gain some experience too Right? I am suspicious about Mr. Gomes too.
But accusing him without evidence… will make the staff panic.
– In that case… if Mr. Gomes is indeed a thief… he’ll be presented to you with
all the stuff he has stolen, sir What? Sir, at least try us out Who’s disturbing me…? Who’s this?
– A well-wisher Why’ve you called
so late in the night? Bad news. You can’t wait
for happy times Your bad times have begun.
– What do you mean? Bantu and Chantu have got to know
that you are the real thief What…?
– That’s not all They’re going to raid your place
with the help of the police tomorrow You have time till tomorrow morning Stash away the booty.
Or you’ll get exposed! I’ll hang up now Disconnected! I must fix the stolen stuff!
The stolen stuff… all the stuff!
– I don’t understand. Stolen stuff! What are you doing?
– Put in all the jewellery I’m a Madrasi from room number 306. Yes? Go ahead.
– I want 10 plates of idlis Swami, it’s 1:30 in the morning.
Is this any time for a snack? I’ve just arrived in a train
from Madras. I’m hungry Hungry, all right.
I’ll send it to you Keep waiting.
And don’t call again Who was it…?
– A wrong number! Let’s go! What to do now. Hurry up! What are you saying?
– Go there. I forgot to order chutney…
how much will the bill be? My friend, don’t worry
about the bill After midnight, we serve idli
and sambar without any cost But you must wait for an hour.
Okay? Please don’t call again The knife!
– Give it to me! Why’re you tearing the mattress?
– Shut up! You don’t know Where is it…?
Here Take that. This one too The flour…
– Want some bread? Shut up! The flour container!
– In the flour? What? The watches!
Go and get them! Since the idli-sambar
is on the house… make it 20 plates instead of 10 My friend, I’ll bring 22 plates
of idlis to you tomorrow The two of us will have
breakfast together We’ll eat and play…
but don’t call up again! The things he has stuffed everywhere!
I can’t figure out anything I’m going to go mad with this man! Hurry up and lock it Where are you going with a bag
early in the morning, Mr. Gomes? Nowhere really. My mother-in-law
isn’t keeping well… so I’m going to look her up
at my in-laws’ place The police are here to take you
to your in-laws You’re trying to
fool us, Mr. Gomes? You’re going to stash
away the stolen stuff? Go ahead They’re the ones
responsible for this I will surely return to
settle scores with you! We’ll wait for you, Mr. Gomes Move it Gomes looked like a rat
looking into a cat’s face No, he looked like a goat
looking into a tiger’s face That’s a nice one, I say.
Here they come… You’ve caught the thief, no doubt.
But we’ve lost something too What?
– Our hearts We don’t catch petty thieves.
– We even know the thieves’ names So go and catch them Gotcha! Gotcha! “Love…” “love…” “love…” “we’ve fallen in love” “Love…” “love…” “we’ve fallen in love” “Love is catastrophe,
love is intoxication…” “love is trust,
love is faithfulness” “Love is life,
love is every happy happiness…” “love is worship,
love is God” “Love…” “love…” “love…” Let’s take some pictures! Hold it… Beautiful! Here’s the picture!
Beautiful girls, beautiful photo Take a look. The magic “In Spring, we find love.
In these sights, we find our love” “When we meet in love,
love blossoms like a rose” “Like the breeze,
love blows…” “like the clouds,
it hovers above us…” “when we get talking,
it rains love” “Love is Spring,
love is the ambience…” “love is the landscape,
love is the breeze…” “love is life,
life is every joy…” “love is worship,
love is God” “Love…” “love…” “love…” “we’ve fallen in love” Help! Help! Someone there…?
Help! What are you thinking about?
Give me a hand… Do you have change for a hundred?
– For a thousand rupees, perhaps? Oh yes Get lost Go away… what rubbish? Help! “When one falls in love,
he becomes a Romeo…” “when love transcends all limits,
it turns into an obsession” Where to…?
Give me my bottle! “In love, one can
do anything…” “in love, he lives.
For love, he dies” “Love is pining, love is fun. Love
is the ache and love is the balm” “love is life,
life is every joy…” “love is worship,
love is God” Nice place, isn’t it?
How about going there? I’ll be back in a moment “Love…” “love…” “love…” “we’ve fallen in love” What dance was that, guys?
– Whose idea was this? Where have you landed me? Welcome, Your Highness Make way… the Queen of Janakpur
is arriving… make way That Queen sure has
an amazing gait Yes, but where is Janakpur?
– Maybe in some corner of Rajasthan Let’s go. It’s time for class Make way, please…
Welcome, Your Highness Your Highness! What happened? Manager! What happened?
– Stay away The floor is so slippery,
I slipped and fell down! I’ve sprained my ankle!
Secretary! Call my lawyer! Very well, Your Highness.
– But you call a doctor… to attend to a sprain,
why call a lawyer? My lawyer will sue the management!
Secretary! Phone my lawyer! Indeed, Your Highness.
– Look… the manager has arrived Please don’t sue us. It’ll spoil
the reputation of our hotel! That’s just what I want. If I had
slipped in Janakpur… I’d have blown the place up
with a bomb! Secretary! Phone my lawyer!
– At once! No, please listen to me!
We’ll compensate you adequately How will you compensate me? If I wish, I can buy out this hotel
even while I stand here! Please remain sitting We’ll give you the Royal Suite.
Absolutely free of cost You can stay for as long
as you wish. Enjoy yourself… but please don’t file a suit! My sprained ankle has ruined
my vacation. How about that? That’s okay. We’ll summon
the doctor… provide you a car, take you
any place you wish to go… and you can stay for as long
as you wish. Free of cost! All right.
I’ll spare you Else, no one could’ve saved his
hotel from turning into ruins So where is my Royal Suite? What do you think?
– Great! That manager will never … look you in the eye again. No one had the slightest suspicion
that you are not the real queen Why should anyone suspect?
If not by birth … my attitude is that of a queen I cut my tongue!
– What happened? Look, there was a glass piece
in this. I cut my tongue How is that possible?
– Secretary, call up my lawyer Queen, what happened? There was a glass piece
in my sweet dish A conspiracy is being hatched to
kill me in this hotel Call the police!
Secretary, call up my lawyer! Yes, Queen
– Forgive us one last time Such a mistake
will never happen again We will provide all your meals
free of cost You think I live off other people,
that you are making that offer? It’s not that. We are just trying
to compensate for our mistake Why do you make such mistakes?
– We won’t make them henceforth The table at the casino is ready.
– Your table is ready. Please come What is this, Queen?
That’s all the money we have left If we lose even this, we won’t
have money even for cigarettes Have I ever given money to anyone,
that I will today? Secretary, call up my lawyer!
– What happened, Queen? Call the ambulance!
This rogue spilled hot coffee on me But why do accidents
happen only with me? This is a murder conspiracy.
There is someone in this hotel … who is trying to murder me Please forgive us,
one last time! First of all,
dismiss this idiot! But what mistake have I made? Send the doctor to my room.
I want treatment Call the doctor! My mother had pawned all her
jewellery, even her wedding chain… to send me here for an education When she comes to know
I have been dismissed … wonder what she will go through Gulshan, don’t cry, please When you cry,
you look like smiling Chantu And you look like a
cartoon even when you laugh How could you call such a bright
student of the institute a cartoon? Hey! Now don’t pull my leg We joke among ourselves.
What’s your problem? I do have a problem.
– Forget it Gulshan has a greater
problem on hand. The counter girl of our casino…
Maria is in greater trouble than him. Someone stole 300,000
from her table The management served her a notice.
If she fails to return the money… within 24 hours, she will be
turned in to the cops Don’t worry. Gulshan, that queen
will apologise to you… and will also have you reinstated.
The stolen money will also be recovered Let’s go.
These girls are boring us Look, the Queen
is coming this way You very conveniently told everyone
you’ll make her apologise. Now what? Let’s find out if she is really
a Queen or not How?
– Come here Come on We are going for boating,
but do you have the money? Have I paid anyone until now,
that I will today? Right, His Highness of Janakpur
is coming No madam, all the cars
have gone to the airport To welcome the
King of Janakpur Yes madam, our hotel’s
reputation is rising The Queen is already here.
With the King’s arrival… the entire royal family
will be our guest Yes, I will now have to leave
to welcome the King! Queen, did you hear that?
The real king is coming And we’re going to jail.
– Let’s run away before that But Queen, why are you doing this? We are checking out!
– But we cannot let you go Why not?
– The King has said… that if the Queen is not present
in the hotel, he will behead us all What! The King knows we are here?
– You are too much, Queen! Then King surely
knows where you are Actually, I am annoyed with him.
That’s why I don’t want to meet him Maybe the King is
coming here to placate you We won’t let you go All right, I have a
condition for staying here As soon as the King arrives,
I should meet him first I promise no one will
come between you and the King Did you hear?
You stay with me Come. Please, Your Highness Pardon us, King.
– How could you dare … you two pittance of a woman,
to go around as my Queen? I will wash this slur on my family
with your blood Guard, give me my sword! No King!
King, even God forgives one mistake Consider us your subjects & forgive
us. We’ll always be grateful to you And we’ll never make
such a mistake again Yes King, it is more noble
to forgive than punish And there is no one
more nobler than you. All right. Since you are
saying this, I’ll save you … from the sin of killing
a woman But tell them they will
have to admit all their crimes What crimes have
you committed here? I faked a fall
and stayed at the hotel for free We dropped the coffee in the casino
and stole 300,000 We put glass pieces in the sweet
dish and ate all meals for free. You will have to pay the hotel bill,
and return the money you stole We’ll do that All right, but you’ll have to continue
with this act for one more day Or the management
will skin you alive The hotel has organized a
party for my welcome tonight You will have to wear all
your real jewellery …. pose as my wife,
and be present at the party I agree Welcome, King Please welcome the
King and Queen of Janakpur Glory to the King of Janakpur! Glory to the Queen of Janakpur!
Glory to the King of Janakpur! The King is pleased Queen, present a pearl necklace
to this man What?
– Gift your pearl necklace to him. No Good Come What is your name, lady?
– Maria. I work in the casino The King is pleased Queen, gift her
your diamond necklace But King, it’s very expensive But not more expensive
than my word, Queen I am proud of you, Queen.
Come Welcome, Queen Falling on some strange man is
against the glory of our royal family The King is annoyed
– Had you done this in the kingdom… I’d order you to be crushed
under elephant feet Should I call for an elephant?
– No… Then apologise to him
and give him a reward I’m sorry, please forgive me.
I slipped and fell The King is pleased Queen, give them a gift.
– Your Highness, I have nothing left You have those rings.
Distribute it among them They won’t come off, King.
– Shall I chop off her fingers, King? No, they came off Glory to the King of Janakpur! Damn the King! All the money we had made in
10 years looting people… he made me lose it
all in 10 minutes Doesn’t matter. Thank our stars
we didn’t have to go to jail. King, after being looted,
the Queen’s gait has changed You are leaving, Queen?
– Yes, we’ll have to go What about the apology letter we
told you to write to the manager… regarding Gulshan?
– Here, take Queen, your neck doesn’t look
good without any jewellery Take, wear my necklace A fake necklace for the
fake Queen from the fake King What!… Who are you people?
– Students of this institute We played this
drama to teach you a lesson Because every man
always has a one-up above him Today, our that’s,
that has happened. One more year of our hotel management
institute’s training has ended. Right. And for the first time,
this has happened. For the first time, two
students have scored equal marks Their names are Chantu and Bantu Both these young men
are our country’s future. Wherever they go,
they will always succeed. Whichever hotel they work for,
they’ll take that hotel… ..to new heights of success. Daddy, please give consent, please! No! Didn’t you find
anyone else to do that? Didn’t you find anyone else
to fall in love with? Chantu and Bantu! Their
names also are so middle class Daddy, no one cares for class here But dear, I will find
grooms for you… …who, even after being reprimanded
by you, will run our resort well. Daddy, you only praised
them to the hilt yesterday. Haven’t you heard the phrase? One
has a different facet for the public. What we did yesterday was that.
– That was our public facet. All right, then get this clear.
We will elope and marry them. You will be disgraced.
– People will spit at you. You will lose face. Khurana, that’s a
horrible picture she’s showing. We’ll have to take the help of that.
– Of goons? Brains. I have realized. Look dear, ask Chantu & Bantu
to come and meet us. We’ll ask them
to come and meet you. What have you done?
– I’ll tell you Just let them come to meet us I will play a trick which
will make them say… …they don’t want to
marry our daughters. How is that? Wow! What a great that.
– Isn’t it a great idea? Let Chantu and Bantu come.
And watch the fun! What happened? Nothing! Nothing at all! We have scrounged all the hotels
in Goa in the last 15 days Despite being gold medalists,
forget as a manager… no one is ready to
appoint us even as waiters They are all demanding bribes
of 25,000 and 50,000 Only a local joint remains now,
should we try there? Don’t joke. We don’t even
have any money left now. We’ll have to spend the night eating
grams, and return home tomorrow How can we go home like that?
How will we face Sundri and Mundri? We’ll have to do something. Hey!
There is one financier in this city… who can give us some money.
– Who? Chantu! You scored excellent marks.
What more do you want in life? It’s all by your grace. Sir, a sweet little girl
wants to meet you, sir Girl? She wants admission?
– I don’t know Call her in.
– Yes sir Come in, sister What are you doing here?
– Where else can I go? Keep your hands away! What’s this?
– A baby. A gift from you I gave you my purse, my chain,
not this Now you don’t stare at me,
tell her! How do I know, sir?
I entered after the climax There was nothing in the movie
except the climax I will stay here.
I won’t go anywhere! Sir, such women cannot be trusted Pay her Rs.50-60 thousand
and send her away All right. 50-60…?
– Pay her a lakh or two A lakh or two! Get out of here!
Get out of my sight! And you unchaste woman!
Just get out of my sight! Then who will support this baby? Such a big deception,
you cheap woman! Let’s go!
– Where are you going! Bantu, you!
– Is my hair okay, sir? I won’t spare you two!
Where is my revolver? I won’t spare them!
I will take revenge! What! Khanna and Khurana want
to meet us? To discuss marriage? Yes. We have been looking for
you since the past four days And you are eating bhelpuri over here.
– We’ve made it! Yes.
– This is not the time to joke Our whole future is
dependent on this meeting Yes, she’s right.
We’ll know after this meeting… whether we’ll live in a
shanty or a mansion Whether our children will study
in a good school and eat burgers… or street snacks
outside a municipal school. Is this meeting so serious? Yes. We’ll have to make
this meeting click so well… that it sets our lives What will your father ask? What do you have which will make
us give you our daughters in marriage? We have everything. Two legs, two
hands, two ears, two eyes, and one… Enough!
– Nose, sir Don’t go further.
An ass has four of those That doesn’t mean we get
our daughters that with them Get our daughters married to them. When life shows that, even
the tough show that and run away What do they show, sir?
– When life becomes a challenge… even the tough show
their backs and run away We are ready to
face any challenge, sir Think again Had he been thinking,
he’d not have had the brawn But now that he has,
we accept the challenge Shall I tell them? We have a that
that’s of no use What are you saying, sir!
– He’s talking of our health resort A local goon has shut it down If you can restart that resort and
run it for at least a year… …only then can we think of
accepting you as our sons-in-law. Until then, you two will
not meet our daughters. Look daddy, if you disapprove
of our marriage, just say so At least don’t conspire to get
our love killed by those goons But they said they are
ready to accept any challenge. Yes, but they didn’t know
you will push them to their death A challenge can be anything.
– The challenged must have that Courage Sir, we have so much courage,
no challenge can confront us Is it?
– Did I speak too much? We will not only restart your resort,
but get it repaired by the one… who damaged it Did you hear that?
– They are going to die! If that happens,
you can meet our daughters What have you done!
– We have to jump in the fray now Father-in-law, make arrangements
for the marriage Peter, two very rich guests
have come to our hotel today Cook very tasty food for them Are you the owner of this hotel?
– Yes. This is a very bad hotel.
You loot people What nonsense are you talking?
– I’d ordered a tandoori chicken You took full money,
but the chicken had only one leg So?
– Do chickens have only one leg? Look. Look You should have whistled like that
at the tandoori chicken Even she would remove her
other leg. Now get lost! Sir, I showed them the entire
hotel, but they want to meet you Is it?
Where are they? Good.
– Very pretty. Your hotel is great Our Sultan wants to come
to such a place for a holiday Rafiq, tell me, can you make this
hotel available to us for a month? What! The entire hotel for a month?
– Yes For the Sultan’s
20 wives and his slaves 20 wives!
– He takes them along everywhere And he has another 30 in his harem.
– That means, 50! He will marry another 10 next year.
– 60! Just tell me whether you can
book the hotel for us or not Of course I can. The rent
of each room will be 5000 What nonsense!
We cannot pay you more than $4000 What!!
I was thinking of Rs 5000 He’s talking of $4000, which is
Rs 200,000 rent per room! We give that much
even in Europe and America Since you are giving me such a
big contract, even I’ll compromise Then we will also pay you
an advance $500,000 next Friday But we want the hotel’s toilets,
lobby, everything in perfect shape Don’t worry about that.
I’ll renovate the entire hotel Damn! Whose tomb is that near
the hotel? That! That’s no tomb,
it’s a resort in ruins It looks like a graveyard.
The Sultan cannot stay here The Sultan wants beautiful
surroundings all around him Do you know, one of the Sultan’s
wives had a pimple on her face He got plastic surgery
done to her entire face Rafiq, the contract
stands canceled! Hey no! Listen to me! I will get that resort repaired.
– You will the it repaired? Why? I only had got it damaged.
– You got it damaged? No, actually, my elder
brother was involved in it Where is that brother of yours?
– He’s in jail now He slapped the ACP… Forget all that. I’ll have the resort
in spick span shape within a week All right, then we will also
pay you an advance after a week Good day!
– Son-of-a-gun! Good day!
Right away! Great! Wonderful! You have done a great job! That roof there has
an empty look. Fix the glass chandelier
in your hotel over here. Then won’t my hotel roof look bad?
– Don’t worry about that. We fit a diamond chandelier
wherever the Sultan stays. What! A diamond chandelier? First fix the hotel chandelier there.
Do you know the rate of diamonds? Even this door doesn’t look good.
Put a good show piece here I’ll have 3-4 show pieces put here.
– Good! You are working so hard. The Sultan will
gift you an oil well. Oil well!
I’ll fry fritters in them. And the advance?
– You’ll get it on Friday night. Let’s go, brother.
– Thank you, sir. Live in style! Excuse me, sir…
– What is it? I’ve done a hotel management
course. I’m looking for a job. No vacancy here.
– Sir, I’m a gold medalist. And I was a gold smuggler.
So? Secretary! Call up my lawyer. Secretary! Call up my lawyer.
– Yes, madam. Madam, why call a lawyer? A conspiracy is being hatched
in this hotel to kill me. Glass pieces have
been put in my ice-cream. It must be a mistake, madam.
I’ll have the ice-cream replaced. And we’ll provide you a meal,
all for no-charge. Is he a manager or a damager? I mean, don’t mind,
that way, he’ll have you ruined. He’s doing the right thing.
If she sues us… …my hotel will have to be sold,
and even my home. What right? Don’t mind,
but each one has his own style. If I was in his place, the Queen would
pay the bill and also leave a tip. Is it?
If you are successful… I will kick him out
and appoint you as manager. Promise?
– Promise! Don’t do that, please. You!
– I know her. I’ll convince her, you leave. What are you doing here?
– The King will follow the Queen. Want to call the police?
I’ll call them. We’ll even show them the
pieces of glass in your purse. Abadabada?
What language is that? Why are you after us?
– Why do you come before me? I will let you off if you pay
the bill, give a decent tip… …and leave with a smile. I will. You also leave.
– We’ll have to teach him a lesson. You are great!
You are wonderful. What did you tell them?
– Don’t ask me that. Sir, whether a king or his subjects,
I treat everyone like that. I appoint you manager
of this hotel from today. And me?
– Dismissed. No sir, I don’t want to
render him jobless. Give him some other position. I appoint you
laundry manager. See! They have started this,
ours that will close Their hotel started,
which will render us speechless We have even lost that What?
– The girls! Father-in-law, we did it.
Remember your deal? Deal? We can meet your
daughters now, can’t we? You know where you have
to send Sundri and Mundri? Where? “What are you doing?” “I am loving you” “But why?” “Because my heart says so” “Ask your heart to wait
at least until we are married” “My heart doesn’t listen,
it’s revolting” “What are you doing?” “I’m going home” “But why?” “Because I’m getting late” “Ask your heart,
at least wait until evening” “But it’s going to be night now” “What are you doing?” “I am loving you” “But why?” “Because my heart says so” “For you, my darling,
I have waited four hours today” “Show some kindness,
love me” “Don’t just leave me and go” “I will stay,
but on one condition” “You will take me to the disco” “You will treat me to pizzas
at Pizza Hut” “And take me around in a taxi” “Why are you making me spend money,
why make me broke?” “That is why I said good bye” “What are you doing…?” “I am loving you” “But why?” “Because my heart says so” Come! “When my father comes to know
I was with you all night” “He will make me run out” “And you will be clean bowled” “That you are in love,
that you are desperate” “Tell this to your father” “Hit a six on the
first ball itself” “Stop taking singles” “How can I hit a six,
when my father is Shoaib Akhtar?” “Confront your father
as Sachin Tendulkar!” “What are you doing…?” “I’m going home” “But why?” “Because I’m getting late” “In your love, my heart says” “I am your hero number one” “Don’t tax me,
don’t create a scene” “Become my wife number one” “O my love, O my Tarzan” “I have a strange feeling” “Listen my love,
my darling” “My heart loves you” “My heart is wounded,
it is naughty, mischievous” “I’m helpless,
my heart is crazy” “What are you doing?” “I am opening my purse” “But why?” “I’m checking the money I have” “This is a sad moment,
and you are worried about money” “More than me, it’s your eyes
that are fixed on my purse” You!
– How was your date? It was great! You have totally
changed my view! My Sultan would be very happy
with you if he came here If your Sultan comes here once…
she’ll keep coming, you see I’ve seen you somewhere, Prince!
– Not me, sir If you could step aside for
a moment, sir… one moment Is the Sultan of Bukhara coming?
– Yes. So here’s my resignation Why?
– This Sultan is Satan, sir What rubbish!
– He’s a crazy philanderer! Yes, sir. He comes with
his slaves and twenty wives When I was in Malaysia, one of the
owners of the hotel happened to… gaze his wife number 13 by mistake.
The Sultan gorged out his eyes! What?
– Yes, sir. Last year in Jakarta… the Sultan was served a cold soup He had the owner thrown
in boiling oil! I don’t believe it!
– Don’t! Experience it! He thrusts live kids into
the Bush Kashi game! What’s Bush Kashi…?
– You saw the movie “Khuda Gawah” ? Yes, thrice.
– The pathans come on horses… and carry a dead goat
with a spear He carries live kids! He owns the bloody place…?
– He does! He owns oil wells He gifts oil wells to every Prime
Minister whose country he visits So what law and order…?
Here’s my resignation Let him gorge your eyes out,
fry you in the oil… or play Bush Kashi with your kids!
I don’t want this job I also want to live!
I don’t want a customer like him! No Bush Kashi! How won’t you give me a booking? The Sheikh will arrive and play
Bush Kashi with you! Before that, I’ll shoot you!
– Sir… what are you doing? If you interfere, I’m going
to shoot you too! I’m not sparing you!
Come on out! See? Such a dangerous tailor! Guess
how dangerous the Sultan will be! Coward! Come on out…
don’t hide! Either take a bullet
or giving me a booking! Get rid of him, please!
– Do you have some money? Money? How much?
– 40 or 50 grand… we must get him to shut up!
– 50,000 ? If we live, we’ll make much more! Step out, coward! Either I get
a booking or you bite a bullet! Want me to come out…?
– Yes! Sultan… keep this!
– No, I don’t accept bribes! I want a booking!
– But this is a gift, Sultan! I want a booking…
– Keep this, please. Please! Scoundrel! If it wasn’t for
this kid, I’d have shot you today! He has left Thanks, you’ve saved my life! I’ll never forget this favour.
Keep this. For you How about a soft drink? The hotel we broke up,
they’ve started it again! We must raze it to the ground!
– What are you doing, Sayba? You want to join your brother
in jail? Use your brains Using brains isn’t my job!
– Never mind When will my brains help? “Goa’s best hotel” This is great, isn’t it…? “India’s best hotel” “Asia’s best hotel”
– Take that! “The best resort in the world” It’s okay. I’ll fix him. Damn you! “The best resort in this lane” Go ahead, feller…
Put up another board! You’re acting smart, are you? One blow and you’ll
sleep forever! Get lost, langur!
– I can see that! Smartass, what blow will you give? See this?
– Don’t show off your muscles! Look at his paunch! Your
hot muscles will turn into ice! Oh, get lost.
– What get lost? Try it out Sayba, thrust your paunch ahead.
Without a fear! Go ahead! Look at the smile! The smile! What are you grinning for…?
I’ll knock all your teeth out! His teeth are so strong,
your fist can’t knock them out! One moment! You saved him the dentist’s fee!
He had to get them out anyway! My boss has the brains!
– Now I’ll smash his brains You’ll break your hand!
It’s a helmet, not just a head Just try! Thrust your head here, sir.
– No, it’s okay Sayba, we’ll have to
put him in his place! You’re going to put me in my place?
One moment At 300 rupees? What’s that? It’s 600 here
and 300 there…? Let’s go there. C’mon Hey! They’re all going there! Yes, he’s selling lunch at 300.
Let’s go and wreck his place! Hang on… he has a heavy hand What about all the food we have?
– It’ll be a huge loss Listen, I can save your losses.
– You? Yes, I. We have a lot of
guests at our hotel suddenly We haven’t cooked so much But you must have a lot of food.
Isn’t it? All because of you! Want to sell it at 200 per plate?
– You think I’m a fool? You’ll sell our food to our customers
and make 100 bucks on each plate? Give it away, sir. Even if it’s
200 bucks, it’s still coming in! The dogs won’t pay you any money.
Give it away to him! Won’t that be a humiliation?
– No way Hey wrestler… we aren’t
out to make money We’re only helping you because
you’ve come to us! Take the food away!
You’ll remember… you had a large-hearted adversary! Take it away What happened then?
– What else? We sold his food to him and made
a profit of 100 per plate! At this rate, his hotel
will close down No, that’s not happening.
What we make in a week… his hotel makes on a
single Saturday night How come?
– He has a cabaret every Saturday night You work in a place like that?
Give up the job immediately Silly girl. On Saturday nights,
I shut my eyes and work We must have the cabaret stopped.
It’s against the law! He has a setting right to
the top… want me set your top?
– No, but we’ll have to find a way It’s ages since we used
formula 36, 24 and 36 What’s that?
– 36, 24, 36 Let’s stop the dance Rubbish! That’s what
the hotel is running on If we stop that,
what do we earn? I’m asking you to stop the dance
only on Saturday nights So it shuts the rival’s hotel forever.
– How? We won’t have a dance in our hotel We’ll display a board of a dance
in the rival’s hotel People from our hotel will go there,
but they won’t have any dancers People will get angry. And our guys
in the crowd will instigate the mob It’ll lead to arson! Our job will be done,
without any effort! What say? You have a fox’s brains, I say! You look like an owl
but you are hare-brained You said something?
– No, sir. Beer Watch it… careful A dance at Blue Lagoon…?
Let’s go. Must be new dancers I can’t understand how
there’s a dance at this hotel What happened? The people are getting angry, Sayba.
The management will have a tough time They don’t have any dancers So start the trouble. And break
down the whole hotel. The bastards! Get the girl! Get started! Beat him up! Hit him! Beat him up! Hit him! We want girls!
– Come down here! “Excuse me…” “excuse me, miss” “Excuse me…” “Excuse me…” “Excuse me…” “excuse me, miss” “They all say to me,
excuse me, miss” “Excuse me, miss…
give me a kiss” “They all say to me,
excuse me, miss” “Excuse me, miss…
give me a kiss” “That’s because my figure…” “That’s because my figure…” “is 36, 24, 36” “They all say to me,
excuse me, miss” “Excuse me, miss…
give me a kiss” “Excuse me…” “excuse me, miss” “So many of them
lost their hearts to me…” “the whole of India
is crazy about me” “Everywhere I go,
I’m surrounded by boys…” “they say excuse me
and bore me no end” “What happens,
my heart asks for more” “Excuse me…” “Excuse me, miss” What rubbish! Where did
the dancers come from? I don’t know, Sayba.
But they look like newcomers So screw up the newcomers! Your plan, wasn’t it? If it fails,
you’re a gone case. Okay? Go and do something! “Listen, guys…
I lack nothing” “No wonder everyone asks me…
will you marry me?” “I have a colourful
youthfulness…” “it’s sweet and spicy” “A look at me and they say,
wow! What a broad!” “Excuse me…” “Excuse me, miss” “Excuse me…” “Excuse me, miss” “They all say to me,
excuse me, miss” “Excuse me, miss…
give me a kiss” “That’s because my figure…” “That’s because my figure…” “is 54, 48, 56” Who are you?
Let me go! Nice arrangement. Why have you guys stopped?
Keep playing the band I’ll play with them Boss, you?
– What is this? You want to kill him…?
Go ahead What are you waiting for…?
Thrash him! Baldie, you’re hanging
on to a girl…? Go there! Why’re you shaking?
You got an itch…? Look at your size and hers…
go and get him! Smartass! As if I get my hands
on you every day! Show the temper there! You’re on their side!
– Oh yes Don’t you touch them! Want me to leave fingerprints?
– Damn you! Take them to the hospital! You bloody manager! I sent you
to wreck the hotel! And you wrecked our own guys?
You want me to break you now? Who told you?
– Who told me? You hit Kallu so hard, he went
through the glass door! You hit Sukhdev so hard,
he fell in the bar counter… and everything fell on him!
– And? You kicked Raju so hard,
he rammed into the cupboard… and everything fell on him!
– So what do you gather? What have I to gather?
– Your guys live off you They’ll recover in a couple of days But think of the losses caused
to him in the arson and breakage I’ve dealt him a blow of
at least a million and a half! How can you say such things! Amazing guy! You make me profit
even in his losses! – Then. Look at that! The place was
swarming with beautiful girls… and it’s as deserted as
a bald man’s head today “Goa’s best hotel”
– Goa’s biggest ruins! Why’s he laughing? His ruin has driven him mad Who’re they…?
– Looks like the insurance guys What happened?
– We have inspected the losses We’ll have to pay at least
5 million as insurance cover 5 million! But he bought
the policy only a few days ago! He had the place insured already Can’t help it, sir. I’ll have to
put together a new disco altogether I’ll have to get the glass
from Belgium… disco lights from America… a quality sound system
from London… See? He wants us to listen! He wants us to be jealous, Sayba All this will cost money.
Isn’t it, sir? But it will surely be
the number one disco! What say? Let’s go in, Sayba Chantu, what will your
mummy and I do in Goa… at this age, leaving behind this
house and everything here? You’ve grown old, not me! Piping hot tea every morning, dad!
Followed by a continental breakfast And relaxation in a
luxurious room after that After that, a small dip
in the swimming pool… How will your mother get into the
swimming pool at her age, my son? As if your mother will!
Give me the phone! We’ll send mummy shopping, dad And the two of us will set out for
a healthy walk every evening And I’ll treat you to a couple of pegs
of the best whisky in the world A couple of them is all right.
But they ought to be big ones Oh yes, also tell him to
arrange for some crisps Also the accompaniment, son. We have worked hard
to make you feel proud of us, dad Come and see for yourself, dad.
You’ll have a lot of rest And Dad, I forgot to tell you
the main thing I have a surprise waiting for you!
– What surprise? I’ll tell you only when you
come here… yes, it’s a surprise Must hang up now. This call is
getting to be too expensive! He is my son. What’s up sir?
You’re in a good mood From night lamp to tube light.
– Since the punk started the hotel.. Business is down in the dumps After many days I’ve got a
good tourist group coming Wish I’d known earlier. I’d have
sent them to Chantu’s hotel Did you say something?
– No. Who is coming? Some folk attending
a college conference Hurry up!
– Welcome to Goa Welcome. Please come.. Holy shit! From where
did this imbecile come? What are you doing here?
– He’s the hotel manager Do you know him?
– Do I? He studied in my college Not studied… both of them
would give us lessons Hey, listen. The guys whose tales
I narrated from Bombay to Goa… Chantu and Bantu… This is Bantu.. Where is sly Chantu? Sir, relax for a while.
We’ll talk later Is he also here?
– Who are you talking of? He was a friend of mine.
– What? He never spoke of Chantu? They were like peas in a pod.
– Really? They can never break up.
They’d fool everyone Sir, what are you saying?
– I’m praising you They were masters.
They’ll say, they’re shaving… They’ll shave your head off
and you won’t even realise They make monkeys out of men.
– Sir, forget it. That’s past Yes but where is he?
– He’s working elsewhere Why?
– There was only one post here Then create a vacancy.
Is he your boss? Sayba.
– Sardesai I’ll give you an idea.
A million dollar idea Create a vacancy in your
hotel and appoint Chantu Once together, they’ll throw
all hotels in Goa out of business And your hotel will be tops Really?
– Guarantee But he never told me… Get him. I don’t know where he is
He’s very far… Don’t worry about money.. Listen!
– That’s Chantu there! Him…?
– Yes! The body builder! Mutton chop! That’s our sworn enemy.
How can they be friends? Yes. Are you joking?
You have to be That’s Chantu. How
can he be his enemy? They must be conning somebody Why are you saying this? Tell the truth. Who is the victim? Me.
– There you go No…
– Shut up! Jaggu! Raja! Ram! Damn you…!
– I messed things? Major trouble!
– Rush down! What…? Where’s he gone…? Sardesai created trouble.
Sayba knows we’re thick pals You should’ve shut him up.
– I tried but he got carried away I couldn’t control him.
– You should’ve strangled him! Forget about what happened.
Now how do we stop Sayba? You go in. I’ll manage him.
– Are you sure? Yes. Where will he hide?
I’ll dig him out! You’re hand in glove with him!
You…! Get him! Let go…! Get the rascal! Your game is up! Killed my Sayba…! Who killed my Sayba! Who killed him? Pedro… You? Scoundrel! Who killed my brother? I don’t know. It was
going on for some days. What’s his name?
– Chantu The cops are on my tail I’ll keep you informed
about where I’m hiding. Let me know the moment
you find the boy. Got it? Leaving? I’m coming.
– When will you return? Is this a five star hotel
that you ask when I’ll return? People who come here once
keep coming back for more Not me but I’ll send two guests. The scamps because of whom
I landed here. Chantu-Bantu I’m speaking.
– So am I Pedro here!
– Oh. Are you well? Did the stupid cops get you yet? Till I nab my brother’s killer,
even the god of death can’t get me Found Chantu?
– Not yet. Pedro has no idea the man helping
him find his brother’s killer… himself is the killer’s best friend This news should be given to Pedro But where the heck is he? I’m hiding in the old cave.
Come here to inform me If you tell anyone else,
I’ll dig your grave here! I get it. Okay The hotel seems closed.
– Is it the right address? The kids pulled a
fast one on us again My son won’t play
such a stupid prank Your son!
– Where do we go? What do we do? Are you the parents of Chantu-Bantu?
– That’s right I guessed right.
You look like their parents Is that true?
– Do you know them? I’m their manager.
– Okay… They sent me here to fetch you.
They’re in an urgent meeting Hop in What? Want to die? What…? You did the right thing
in coming straight to me I have an old account
to square with Pedro. Pedro is a dangerous criminal.
We’ll besiege the cave with our force Where’s the inspector?
– This way Gomes has kidnapped your parents! But he was in jail…?
– He’s out. And he’s got your parents Now he wants to meet you Who is Gomes?
– He was our assistant manager We caught him stealing. He was
jailed. Maybe he wants revenge This is a major problem.
– Sir, there’s a plan Who has it?
– Him. Tell him… The plan… I know you and Chantu are pals I want to tell Pedro.
– What will you gain? I want to get your bones broken And Pedro will do that for me.
You’ll take me to Pedro You know what I’ll do to your
parents if you won’t take me You sent me to jail! One thing can be done.
Play this game with Chantu I’ll give you Rs. 10 lakhs
for sparing my parent’s life. You’ll get your revenge and the cash
– Fooling me, you dumb waiter! Where will you get the cash?
– I’m marrying Khanna’s daughter I’m dead if you refuse later.
– But you can tell Pedro about me Don’t forget he’s your best friend! People kill their brother to save
their skin. He’s just a friend Friend to a scoundrel.
– I’m a dog What’s this? Bantu put a microphone in Gomes’
pocket. Now we can hear him But how…?
– Just a minute Man, where have you brought me?
– Hold your horses… Anyone there?
– Good God! Nobody here What’s wrong?
– Nothing Yes?
– It’s me. Bantu Why have you come here? Who is he?
– He’s Gomes Wants to talk about Chantu.
– Where is he? Will you come this way?
– What is it? Pedro Sir, do you want
Chantu’s whereabouts? Bantu can give it.
Actually they’re best pals Together they were making
an idiot out of your brother What nonsense!
– I’d have found out by now… The cops haven’t got here because
their parents are in my control At a place nobody can doubt.
– Where? I’ll tell you later He’s a cad! Just won’t
mention where he hid them Or we’d have got them now.
– Now what happens? Now we’ll use… plan number two If your news is wrong, I’ll
crack your skull like a coconut Get it? Swine! Where’s your pal?
– Mr. Pedro, my friend is no more Your brother was my friend.
– Silence! But he says, your friend
killed my brother And you’re working with the cops! Such a big lie! Dear God,
why is this happening to me? Actually, the cops have kept a reward
of half a million on your head He’s blackmailing me to get that.
He kidnapped my girl friend He forced me to take him to you.
– He’s lying! Pedro, he’s pretending You’re acting!
– Gomes! Stop it! Move! Move back! Are you all right, Bantu?
– How’d you get out of his captivity? This servant of the rascal
Gomes brought some food Seizing the opportunity,
I clubbed him and escaped What are you doing here? Who is he?
– ACP Pande He was hiding and probably
listening to Radio Mirchi Isn’t that a wireless machine?
What were you listening to, on it? Answer or I’ll slaughter you! Speak!
– Gomes gave us information He’d lead us to you and
we’re connected by wireless There.
– Lies! It’s a trick played by the cops We’ll know if the cop is lying.
Let’s search him Yes. – Stand straight.
Let me frisk you I have nothing.
– We’ll see Pedro, my brother
this was in his pocket What is it?
– It’s called a microphone 5 miles away, the voice can
be heard through this machine You hear it yourself.
– No, sir. They’re pretending 1, 2, 3… that’s it. I’ll settle scores with you later I’ll first make
mince meat out of you! It’s not my fault.
Listen to me. No! One last chance. Listen… I’ve locked their parents
in the jungle in a car Get them here and
the truth will be clear But put this away… Out! Who are you?
– C’mon Yes! Here they are.
2 families together! Come on.
– Welcome You come here… you this way… This is Mr. Pedro. Tell him that
you’re Chantu and Bantu’s parents And Chantu and Bantu are
best friends since they were 4 But towards whom do we point? Don’t you recognize your own son?
– Must be the one who is tied My son! My darling! My love! Whom is he kissing?
– what have they done to you? That cad is a cop! What do I do with you?
– Like the cheat Bantu… his parents are cheats. By God! Give me one chance.
I’ll skin his parents! Then I’ll see how he screams! You said you’d pay us.
Then why are you hitting us? Confess that Bantu is your son! Stop! You never said you too
would be acting Now, who are you?
– I’m Principal Sardesai I run an acting school.
You must have heard of it Here’s my card. This man
came to me yesterday Said, he’d give a chance
to our students in a film You said, it’s a role
of parents of 2 youngsters You never mentioned whips.
We charge extra for that Now what do you have to say? Move. Acting school!! I know this schmuck well He’s the Principal of
Chantu and Bantu’s college He’s hand in glove with them. They’re all together.
– He’s the only one separate I’ll show him!
– Don’t hit me! Stop! Now who is she?
– No idea. I’m a helpless woman
tormented by Chantu-Bantu Gomes is right. Chantu
and Bantu are friends Brother Pedro, they’re responsible
for sending your brother to his grave Do you have evidence?
– That’s not needed Whip the boy
and his mother will yell My Bantu!! A son may ignore his mother’s pain
but a mother can’t bear his agony That’s right. Let’s give it a try Gomes, you get another chance Get started. Make way! Now we’ll know whose son you are Don’t beat him! Stop! Now what do you want? This woman is a cheat. Bantu
caught her red handed in your hotel She’s seeking revenge.
– No! Really? Didn’t you come to our hotel
as Queen of Janakpur for a free meal? She mixed glass in the pudding
and blackmailed the late Sayba But that…
– Heard that? Bantu had exposed her hoax. I was demoted from Manager to
Laundry Manager because of him But I’ll only speak the truth I can’t bear it no more!
Now I’ll fire a gun not the dagger! Hold it.
– What the heck! Now who is it?
– Hold on. Hear me out first Whoever you are, don’t say
Chantu-Bantu are friends… and are in this together.
– Right, but first listen… I’ll show you. I have evidence Here they are and that’s
Mr. Khanna, the elder brother… Now what do you have to say? Now I’m convinced Anybody there to stop me? No one.
– Nobody… come on. Move it. Come on! I give you one minute
to tell where your pal is Else I’ll shoot everyone You finish the rest
while I shoot him I’ll count to 3. One… Two…
– Stop. You! You’re here, you jerk! I’ll first shoot you!
You’ve troubled me a lot! Who threw the shoe? Did you throw it? You…? You?
You? You? Not me It was you. Show me your foot! Show me your foot! Beat them up! Let me go!
– Don’t spare him! My shoe! The shoe… Freeze! Nobody moves! Nobody moves! Why are you laughing? Shoe! Threatening me with a shoe! Let me wear it Let me wear the shoe. I said,
time please! I’m just not ready… I hear you give chance to new heroes.
– Yes You have a great personality.
Here’s my card I’ll make you a hero Excuse me.
– Please… Is she a heroine?
– Yes You talk to anyone Side! Or I’ll break your head.
– No bullet in it I can handle you with my legs What a shot! On whose side are you?
– Sir, but I’m your man! Your laundry manager.
– Thank God Get your clothes washed
for free in the laundry Where’s he gone? Gill, move some more You got my son whipped! You! My son!
– She’s caught us! The mother not only cries but
uses the whip when her son is hurt Don’t you have men at home?
– Shut up! Don’t’ be scared. Come on Don’t hide behind a woman. Come out!
– Face him! He has a stick!
– Coward, come out! Hit the man, don’t talk.
– Holy smoke! Shall we go? Whose side are you on?
– Pedro’s So am I.
– Really? I lied to you Where has he gone?
I’m going home! Mother! I am fine Get the ambulance Leave him! My brother! Bantu! You can’t leave me alone! My child! The bullet just grazed your arm.
How did you get the other wounds? What can I say?
A short prank proved costly Meaning? I pretended to die when shot I held my breath as long as I could But when I took a
breath after a minute… I started laughing. Sundri,
Mundri and Chantu beat me up You’re a rogue Now come and sit with the guests We’re coming. Just hold on Your kids worked a miracle. Something that wasn’t working… is now operational Our resort was shut for years They not only ran it
but ran it so capably… that it’s earning more
profits than our other resorts. We’re what you call it…
finding such good what’s it..? Happy to find such sons-in-law. We’ll take guru’s blessings and
get them engaged and married soon Guru? He’s not what you call it…
– No saint An industrialist.
Totally detached We worked for him We initiate every good deed
of life with guru’s blessings There he comes! Welcome.
– May you be happy You! What are these goons doing here?
– We’re dead meat!

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